Q: I am very impatient and want to ride now! How long is it going to take to learn?
A: How long it takes to learn varies from person to person. I have seen people ride on their first day and others after months of randomly practicing. The most important thing is to not give up no mater how long it takes because you will eventually learn, and then it won't mater how long it took.
Q: You people are all so good. You were just born with the ability to unicycle, right?
A: Although it may seen like the good riders can do everything easily, it's important to remember that we all started in the same place. No one has ever been born with the ability to ride a unicycle, except Kris Holm.
Q: I really want to come to unicycle club but my 24-inch uni is in the shop because of a flat seat, and I misplaced my 10-foot giraffe unicycle, and my 20-inch unicycle got towed because I left it in a handicapped spot (not my fault, I had the handicapped tag hanging from the seat). I let someone borrow my 36-inch uni and never got it back, and my other 20-inch unicycle actually has a whole other wheel attached to it because its actually a bicycle. What I'm trying to say is, I don't have a unicycle at all. Do you guys have one I can use at the club?
A: There are many unicycles of all sizes, shapes, and colors to use at the club. Just get yourself to the club, and we'll set you right up.
Q: I'm new to the unicycle club, and I usually just walk in and grab a uni and start riding. Last week I grabbed this sweet Trials uni, and I was really tearing it up out there when this guy came over and asked to switch unis with me. Then he handed me this yellow piece of garbage and rode off on the sweet whip I scored earlier. I don't think it's fair someone can do that. Can we make a rule like "riders keepers, uni-less weepers" so that that doesn't happen?
A: That's an interesting rule idea; however, what probably happened is you unknowingly picked up this person's personal unicycle at the beginning of club (which is okay), and then when he wanted to ride his own awesome uni, he found a club uni to switch with you. There are lots of unis in the gym, so it's a good idea to ask someone which one you should ride before you jump on. But I'm sure you were really tearing it up.
Q: Can I borrow a unicycle from the club to use at home? Because I don't want to come to club until I can already ride.
A: The unicycle club does not loan unicycles. Many of the unicycles available for use at club are club members' personal property. And not coming to unicycle club until you can already ride is a big mistake. The club is the best environment to learn in, no matter what your ability.
Q: Can I borrow a unicycle from the club to use during the week? Because I want to practice like crazy and get awesome, awesomer than everyone else because unicycling is awesome and it's my favorite thing in the whole world. Unicycles are awesome. So can I?
A: See previous question: The unicycle club does not loan unicycles. Many of the unicycles available for use at club are club members' personal property. If you love unicycling that much, maybe it's time to make the commitment of purchasing your own unicycle.
Q: Unicycling is way too cool for me. Do you people do anything else?
A: Yes, it's common to witness us practicing many other circus skills like juggling, rope twirling, ball spinning, hat manipulation, tightrope walking, sitting on the floor, contact juggling, diabolo, cigar boxes, free-standing ladder, slackline, and couch sitting.
Q: Is it true that unicycling is not a sport because they don't make any special shoes for it?
A: It is true there is no mass-produced shoe specifically for unicycling; however, you wouldn't know that was not the intention of the Converse All-Star.
Q: Are there any things you as unicyclists are sick of people saying to you, even though they think they are being original and funny?
A: Yes. Here are a few.
"Where is your other wheel?" This is neither original nor funny.
"I can do that." This is usually said by a drunk guy trying to impress a girl. Which is stupid because if he could ride, he would know that it doesn't impress girls (except for a special few).
"I can do that, can I try? Lemme try, lemme try, lemme try." This is usually said by an even drunker guy trying to impress his guy friends. Which makes no sense whatsoever.
"Where is your other wheel?" I hear this one so much I thought it should be listed twice.
Humming the circus song. I have no comment, except you're humming the circus song.
"Can you spare some change?" No.
"Where is your other wheel?" I hear this one so much...and I wish people would stop asking.